Modern Romance

23453112by Aziz Ansari
4 of 5 stars

This came highly recommended to me and I loved how in-depth it is! This is a funny but well-researched book on how dating and romance have changed in the age of the Internet, and I found myself fascinated. I grew up right in the middle of the transition–in high school, it was unusual to have your own cell phone. Then in college it was uncommon to have a smartphone. Now of course, they are omnipresent, and Aziz’s observations tended to line up with mine.

There are a lot of “rules” people almost instinctively observe (if you don’t have the instinct, you will fall in line pretty fast don’t worry) when it comes to response times, length of messages, punctuation / emojis and subtext that I had been taking for granted until I saw it laid out in bullet points. That quickly cleared up why communication is exhausting! When you add the hopes and fears of starting a romantic relationship, it’s mind-boggling in its intensity. I definitely share the fear of commitment to meeting up in person, but apparently the only cures for social anxiety or nerves is to just do it. Everyone else is just as nervous as you!

Basically, we’ll all be happier if we choose to live more in the real world than in the phone world, so it’s worth remembering that no matter how much fear you have of missing out on something online, the sure way to miss out is to ONLY be present online.

If you’d like to see more reviews or buy a copy for yourself, Modern Romance is available on Goodreads and on Barnes & Noble’s website here. Please consider supporting your local bookstore!

Similar reads:

  • Yes Please by Amy Poehler – A funny and inspiring autobiography about being a woman in comedy and television. I really enjoyed her perspective! See my review here.
  • The Emotional Craft of Fiction by Donald Maass – If you want an interesting contrast between the relationships we see in media and the relationships in your life, check this out. It’s all about what evokes emotions within us, and how we manipulate those emotions when we can pull all the strings. I feel like romance and friendship are both idolized on screen and in books and maybe Aziz’s book can help you pick apart why that is. See my review here.

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